Tony Abbott has been Australia’s Prime Minister now for 630 days.
And what did he do to celebrate this Sunday?
— Simmo, just Simmo (@SimmojustSimmo) May 31, 2015
I am struggling to find evidence that even one of those long 630 days was spent in the service of the country he claims a mandate to lead.
All I have seen of our Dear Leader is a man intent on pandering to his own personal whims and the causes of moribund neoliberalism.
How many times over the past nearly two years has Tony Abbott donned the lycra, or the budgie smugglers, or the running shoes to demonstrate his Putinesque qualities and his hard-man physical prowess?
It’s been too…
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What did you do in the great Class Wars Daddy?
I kept my head down & worked hard for our future. All sensible people agreed with our Prime Minister and with the people on TV who said that climate change is rubbish, just natural & we can’t do anything about it.
What did you do to help the refugees, Daddy?
I boycotted Halal foods, I tore scarves off women’s heads on trains, I called for Mosques to be Firebombed, I spread hate against Islam because I’m NOT a racist, I applauded the turning back of boats containing refugees all coming to impose Sharia Law & threaten our way of life.
How did you know this was the right thing to do Daddy?
I watched commercial Television & bought Newspapers that were all owned by the same business interests. I knew they were right because they all told me the same thing & they called anyone who disagreed a “Lefty” or a “Greenie”. I didn’t know what they meant, I just knew they were something I didn’t want to be. The TV was full of people I wanted to be, I knew that because they were on TV & people watched the shows & talked about them as if they were something to want to be so I knew I was on the right track. No-one on TV ever said “Hang on, maybe this isn’t quite right”, Let’s look at this again. No they just kept filling up the screen with images of brown-skinned terrorists blowing things up and good white Australian people renovating houses, or cooking, endless shows like this that people I knew always watched.
What did you do Mummy?
I watched endless “reality” TV shows & bought women’s magazines religiously so I would know what was happening in the world. I worried constantly about my appearance & tried every new health fad that hit the market. I looked down on women who were looking after kids on their own because you just know there must be something wrong with them that they haven’t got a man. I knew that because watching TV told me so. I also knew that gay men were something great as long as they were a bit camp & made us laugh. Lesbians never really existed because they were never, ever on TV unless you count Ellen & she never made you think uncomfortable thoughts about what two people might do in bed. I spent as little time as possible with my kids because “society”. Pop out the baby, stay home for a little while because you must be champing at the bit to get back to work, pop them into daycare so that someone else brings up my kid, go off to work & winge & moan about how unfair life is. Endlessly repeat. Harshly critise anyone, anyone at all who dares to question our decisions which we know are right because we got them from the TV or the magazine.
Just created a new site where I hope to bring together all the stuff that I do.
I’ll also be re-posting some stuff from years ago as well as all of the usual sort of things you have come to expect from me.
Come, read, enjoy & comment
Discuss with others either on Twitter including me @suthernx
or on my brand new Facebook page